The 1960 Aston Martin DB4 Zagato. 20 were built (should have been 25 but they didn’t sell).

The title of this post is misleading but too good not to blog.

It raises a question. What’s the sexiest car of all time?

I don’t mean ‘which car would you most like’ but, which vehicle, in its metal, has the ability to semaphore barely restrained sexual energy so powerfully you it’s almost arousing?

The Mercedes 300SL has it, almost any Lamborghini has it and Ferrari’s often lack it. On a more mundane level I’ve never been able to resist a woman in a primer-coated classic, and find that ‘Grandad Cars’ have a sex-appeal born of the ease with which you can have sex in one (thank you bench seats).

The beast above is the great Aston Martin DB4 Zagato. An English car in an Italian suit which can’t, in my eyes, be improved upon. Any ideas of your own?

No Corvette’s post 1972 for reasons of taste.

Popularity: 10% [?]

Eva Padburg sells a car.

Mercedes have employed Eva Padberg in an attempt to add sex-appeal to their cars. Based on a quick analysis of her work in Playboy I’m thinking mission accomplished.

Eva Padberg thinking about seatbelt pre-tensioners.

Eva Padberg can’t find her keys.

Google Eva until you understand why Mercedes have made the right decision.

Popularity: 26% [?]

In the age of the web it’s hard to trust the veracity of wacky stories you can’t find a link to. Ironically, the world doesn’t seem real unless it’s represented digitally. John Hind’s Motorworld column for ‘Top Gear’ Magazine is packed with more sexual potential than the combined bras of Girl’s Aloud. I can’t find online ‘proof’ of any of this stuff but if you think that makes stories this good less likely to be true I pity your lif in a world devoid of stuff like this:

“The deputy sheriff of Snow Hill, Maryland, was arrested for allowing a woman to pose naked on the sheriff’s squad car, while the deputy sheriff of Martin County, Florida, was fired for spending his days filming women in bikini’s showerig on the beach. In one day alone six officers were suspended in Mesa, Arizona, for having sex in their squad cars. But topping the lot, in Urbandale, Iowa, an officer was fired after fellow officers realised he was driving around with a battery-operated sex device inserted in his rectum.” Top Gear Magazine, September 2007.

I could consult the local press in all the places Hind references but as a writer for the UK’s most popular car magazine he’s unlikely to be pulling crap off the web without bothering to fact-check. Then again…

“A 20-car pile-up ensued in Arkansas City when a woman, believing she was experiencing ‘The Rapture’ screamed “Jesus is back!” and leapt cheerily through her moving car’s sun roof. The woman, a Christian, had thought that 12 blow-up sex dolls, filled with helium, which had floated over the highway in front of her, were fellow humans rising to heaven.” Top Gear Magazine, August 2007.

Damn.

More shaggy dog stories can be found in each month’s UK print edition. (Editors of Top Gear, if I can make up more interesting car-sex stories than Hind do I get a job too?)

Popularity: 27% [?]

The thousand plus bikini shots posted to Flickr of the ‘NOPI Swimsuit Nationals’ prove the motorsport and sex industries have more than lubricant, hot rubber and fast laps in common.

With serious cash prizes involved exhibitionists and broke-hotties alike compete to have “YEAH THAT’S WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT!” shouted at them by guys who think women like lowered Honda’s. It’s a celebration of America’s confused love of tits and hatred of sex which allows women who “…would never!” to spray colored rubber cement on their junk and pole dance while telling themselves they’re in a fashion show. It’s pure aircore porn.

Like I said, over a thousand photos. Video too.

Popularity: 30% [?]