These sex tips which cam to me via a link request were either written by:
a) A genius
b) The foxy Russian chick pictured who looks exactly like Aria Giovanni because she is and thus didn’t.
1. Meet hit without panties when he came from work and tell him about.
2. Meet him when he came from work only in stockings and belt.
3. Put your hand in his pants when he watching the game and start to masturbate.
4. Slip hand in your jeans when your and the partner watching some TV show and start to masturbate.
5. Nestle to him after supper and start kissing his penis.
6. Suggest taking shower together for a change. Lather him and let he lather you.
7. Start to make oral sex in shower.
8. Make oral sex in bed, do it slowly and enjoy.
9. Ask him to licking your pussy.
10. Ask what his favorite desire in sex is.
11. Ask him what he is dreaming about but dread to say.
12. Bed him down the back and start to have sex.
13. Bite his nipples
14. Ask him to park the car in imperceptible place and to have sex at the back seat.
15. Nightly came at the garden and make sex at grass, under the tree, anywhere.
16. Let he masturbate over you so as he cum at your breast.
17. Let he se(sic) the way you masturbate and show him the better way to satisfy you.
18. In time of sex put active vibrator in your anus.
19. Ask him to make anal sex, but carefully, lest hurt you.
20. Dress as a San Francisco broad it should be only corset and hat flags.
I trust like me you’re now trying to work, “In the time of sex put active vibrator in your anus”, into conversation.
I think Borat wrote most of those, actually…
Nice I really liked it.
I am still working on “it should be only corset and hat flags.”
Dan - C’mon!
JockM - Once you’ve had hat flags you never go fat slags.
In regards to 18, shouldn’t it read, “In time of sex put active vibrator in his anus”?
Furry - I think that’s just one other way to do it…
Looks like someone’s been playing with a random free online translator, haha.
Chris - It’s just a bit too good though. The messed up grammar is bang on. Not as hatstand as babelfish. More “I like to make some fuck, berzerker!”
I can agree with that assessment, to a point.
I always thought Aria would have better English.
Number nine makes me giggle.